Go EXTREME GREEN!

About a week ago a Subway employee refused to give me a bag and curtly asked me to,and I quote 'Keep our country green.'Then began my epic quest to prove her wrong.Here's what I'm doing to green the earth.

I disposed of all the soaps,detergents and washing liquids from my home and replaced it with a biodegradable concoction of mine made primarily of poison ivy and bougainvillea thorns.In addition to being non-polluting, its also a cleansing scrub that stimulates boodflow as I discovered that I was covered in raw red spots everytime after use.See,green is good!

Electricity is not an option for me now.After making several discreet trips in the dead of night to sever the power lines to my home(and possibly to the homes of others several miles around mine),I'm currently electricity-free!Living a la cave!Also by applying the principles of energy conversion,I have employed 10,000 hamsters to run in their wheels to generate some green electricity for my laptop use.The same goes for the fridge,oven,lights,fans and TV.(No hamsters were harmed in the making of electricity).

I say no to paper now too.No newspapers,no paper towels,no tissue paper,no toilet paper and not even paper clips.Recently I have even ceased to play my favourite game of all time 'Rock,PAPER,Scissors'.Life is hard.But that's the price for being green.And I would like to note that Subway uses PAPER cups and wraps all its sandwiches in PAPER.Hypocrites.

I've noticed that plenty of celebrities have gone green as well.Just look at Shrek and The Incredible Hulk.So BE GREEN!Or you'll make the hulk angry,and you won't like him when he's angry.

Till next time...